Wednesday morning, aproximately 9:30.
Me: “Crime Check, what are you reporting?”
Heavily accented Indian male voice: “Yes, my name is Sanjay*. I am calling to you from Mumbai* about your advert.”
(*I couldn't understand what he actually said...)
Me: “I'm sorry, I think you have the wrong number. This is a non-emergency number for the police department.”
Caller: “Yes. I am calling to discuss with you a possible proposal for marriage.”
Me: “Sir, you have the wrong number. This is Spokane...Washington State?”
Caller: “Yes, I know I am calling to Washington. I am calling because I like what I saw in your profile on-line and would like to talk to you about possible proposal for marriage.”
Me (trying to be patient): “Sir, you have the wrong number.”
Caller: “Yes. My friend gave to me your number and I look up your profile and your picture, and I like what I see. I want to know if you would be interested in meeting at some future date.”
Me: “Sir, can you understand me?”
Caller: “Yes, yes.”
Me: “Sir, this is the po-lice department, in Spo-kane, Washington. This is not a dating service. I think you have the wrong number. What number are you trying to call?”
Caller: “I don't know, my friend in California gave to me this number.”
Me: “Well, sir, I'm afraid he is either playing a joke on you or you wrote the number down wrong; this is the police department in Spokane.”
Caller: “Oh! Well, I am afraid that someone maybe has been putting me on! I am so sorry! This is the number I was given to call. Who are you? You have been so nice to me, what is your name?”
Me: “My name is Tera (because we are required to give it if people ask)" and for good measure: "with 911 and the police department in Spokane, Washington."
Caller: “Is there another number that I can call you at for maybe a later time?”
Me: (pause) “...I'm sorry?”
Caller: “Yes, I would like to call you for another time to discuss a possible proposal for marriage.”
Me (not trying too hard not to laugh): “I don't think so. You really have a wrong number, sir. I need to hang up now.”
Caller: “Yes. Thank you. I am sorry. Have a nice day.”
***Keep in mind this is an abridged version of the conversation. It actually took about 15 minutes. I couldn't understand him at all at first and it took a bit before my ear figured out the accent, plus I was trying to sort out what kind of emergency or issue he might have. I almost got a translator on the line until I figured out what was going on. Then there was about twice the amount of back and forth while he talked to me about the "website profile" and the "proposal of marriage". The sad thing is, I think he was serious! ...maybe I should have asked for a picture first!?